Sidebar: --Google--

So, I was on Google trying to be productive with my life and I decided to see what the response would be if I typed in my own name. I was not trying to be conceited or self-validating. There was a purpose, I promise. I really wanted to know what potential employers would find. So I Googled myself and the search returned 143 results. (Yes! High score) So I began to sift through the listings in complete and total happiness… then came the blow. Page 2, second result. Alexzenia Herbert from Brooklyn, New York. Excuse me? Now I’m sorry but I’m no Sarah, Julie, or Jane. I am Alexzenia. I walk in complete isolation. When it comes to the name game I am a unique specimen completely unheard of by the virgin ear. You don’t speak this name unless you know me. But here goes some nobody calling herself Alexzenia, spelling it the same way as I do. That’s a problem. Chick stole my name. Okay, so yes I was named after my great grandmother. But she died before I was born so as far as I’m concerned there is only room for one of us. As I continued through the pages I was appalled. There was no more Alexzenia Davis: journalist, Smithite, poet, Brooklynite… there were a whole bunch of other Alexzenia’s black, white, and beyond. There were blond Alexzenia’s and brunette Alexzenia’s. There were married Alexzenia’s and divorced Alexzenia’s. There were living Alexzenia’s, there were dead Alexzenia’s. And I just need to know: where the hell did you all come from?